i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize