I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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