im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
