i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
