I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
