Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize