Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Is it penis luge time yet?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Randomize
