I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
