There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
