Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize