HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
