I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
