Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
