four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
