her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
