What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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