on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
