Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I feel great
I just peed on a car
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
