She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
