so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize