none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Less talking, more tequila
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize
