Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
