My nipple is on Facebook.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize