Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
