hell yes lets make some ravioli
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
