i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
