real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
