David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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