Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
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