Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize