I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
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