god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
