she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
