I think I just saw someone hide a body.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I hope mine doesn't look like that
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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