On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize