guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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