I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize