This girl is more easily done than said...
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
soo... how was my night?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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