ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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