no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
