All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
