I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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