you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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