I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
