so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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