I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
