i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
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