So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
