You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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