Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
