Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
